There’s a place deep in ours hearts in a place we ponder things that we don’t admit to anyone else (and at times, not even admit to ourselves). In that place there’s a tiny voice that speaks to us and oftentimes we push the voice aside not wanting to think it could be true of us to even think of such a thing. You know what I’m talking about, I know you do. On the rare occasion that we do allow ourselves to ponder the voice, if brought to our conscience if even for a brief moment the thought that perhaps we don’t love the Lord as much as we should or we desire to. Am I right? I think if we say that that thought didn’t come to us we would be lying because we are but human.
I love the Lord with what I think is my whole heart, but the three main sources of sin at times crowd out what I know could be a deeper love. A more committed, more dedicated love. The lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life.
“Do not love the world nor the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world. The world is passing away, and also its lusts; but the one who does the will of God lives forever.” —1 John 2:15-17
In my read-through-the-Bible-in-a-year reading plan that I use on my phone app, YouVersion, I’m reading it aloud to my son at night in the dark. I have a setting that lets me have low light so it helps him to fall asleep as I’m reading the Bible to him. The background is black and the text is white, so the only light is from the text of the Word of God itself. Anyway… right now the Old Testament portion is taking us through the life of King David. If there is anyone in the Bible whom it demonstrates as loving the Lord more than anyone else (other than Jesus Himself) it’s King David. The book of Psalms is full of psalms of David declaring his love to the Lord. His thoughts towards the Lord and declarations of his adorations.
We all know that David fell into sin from time to time but he always repented immediately and mourned over his having fallen into sin. He didn’t deny his sin as being anything but what it was. Though he fell into sin with Bathsheba and again when satan tempted him to count Israel, when the prophets of God (Nathan with Bathsheba and Gad with the numbering of Israel) confronted him, he immediately repented and looked to the Lord for help in overcoming and being restored. Though he fell into sin God called David, “The Apple of My Eye”. God knows in our human, fallen nature we will fall. He understands that. He wants us to immediately come to Him to be restored, as David did.
So my thought today for this Mindful Monday devotion is are we brave enough to admit that little, hidden place in our heart exists that tells us we need to love the Lord more than we do? Will we have the courage to tell the creator of the universe and the One who sent His Son to die for us that we don’t love Him enough? I want to have that courage, don’t you? If we are servants of Christ, we will always want to love Him more than we do at any given time. The more we get to know Him through His Word and in prayer, we will learn to love Him more. God loves an honest heart and I really think he will honor us when we ask Him to help us love Him more. If were to ask my husband to help me love him more, he would focus on me not loving him much instead of what my heart’s desire would be to increase my love for him; and in all honesty none of us have the power to make someone love us apart from being good to them and honoring them in our lives. God however can. He knows our hearts and knows that secret place in the depths of our hearts better than we ourselves do and He understands and will help us to love Him more every day. The more we love Him, the easier it is to die to self and live for Him; and the more we can love and serve each other and ourselves.
That’s my heart’s cry today.
You are my Lord, my God, my King. You are worthy of all of my worship. Help me, by Your grace, to know You more and love You so deeply and dearly that the things of this world fade away and grow strangely dim.
I see my sinfulness. I feel my weakness.
I see my self-centeredness. I feel my flesh want its own way.
I see my pride. I feel my flesh rise up inside.
Lord, I love You. I want to love You more. I want a heart that wants to serve You before self.
Lord, I want to love You.
I want to love You more than anything or anyone.
I want to love You more than I love myself.
I want the deeds that reflect You and Your character.
I want others to see You in me –and not me.
I need You, and I need Your Word.
My hardness of heart, my thick headedness, my stubborn ways, and my human passions all keep me from knowing You as well as I could and seeing You as You truly are. Help me see You, help me hear You, and help my mind understand You.
O Lord, grant me Your grace! Help me love You.
In Your name, Amen